EPISODE 5: Courtney Resch
INTRO CREDITS
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EPISODE INTRO
Welcome back to this week's episode y'all. I hope you're fine. Today we have my dear dear friend Courtney rash here with us. Courtney is like my fairy godmother big sister or very good big sister, as well as my neighbor, hairstylist, the Chris McMillan to my Jennifer Aniston, which is a very nice reference. And if you just got that sled to my DMs so I can send you a prize. She's the owner and master stylist at Ashton salon, in La Jolla, California, an entrepreneur, educator, mom and all around Rockstar who inspires me every single day. Courtney and I initially bonded over some mutual traumas, which like isn't funny, but it's kind of funny now. And she has been through some seriously difficult shit, including a traumatic brain injury of broken back and more that I'm going to let her explain... as if those two first things weren't enough. In the midst of all this, she continued to run a business — one that she's had for about 15 years — get engaged and married have a baby and Girlboss so, so close to the sun. I brought her in today for our first edition of a series called trauma hour. Basically, we are going to drink wine, unpack, talk about some real shit, and use humor as a coping mechanism while talking about what we've learned fine, right, a trauma. Hopefully though, after this, you feel a little bit less alone, a little more validated and maybe a bit lighter overall.
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INTERVIEW
Alright, welcome to Trauma Hour! Courtney. I'm so stoked you're here. I have absolutely no idea how this conversation is going to go. We've opened a bottle of wine. Big thanks to my beautiful, sweet dentist Sienna Palmer who gave us Palm Rosé ...
Courtney Resch 2:28
I wish my dentists gave me rose.
Dominique Astorino 2:29
I know right. I hope she's hearing this. You're so special to me Sienna.
Thank you for this wine.
Because for some reason, these two besties are really nervous about recording our first podcast together.
Courtney Resch 2:43
You know, your voice in front of you, in your ears a little bit ...
Dominique Astorino 2:47
Feels dee-sGUH-sting.
Courtney Resch 2:50
It's alright, we'll get there.
Dominique Astorino 2:51
All right, well, all right. So we're kicking off this series called trauma hour, which is a really scary sounding thing that I think is only funny to me right now. But my hope is that it will sound funny to other people. Because I'm like, yeah, it's happy hour. But you started drinking and then you start unpacking your shit with your friends.
Courtney Resch 3:10
Yeah.
Dominique Astorino 3:10
Right. Like...
Courtney Resch 3:11
Yeah, I mean...
Dominique Astorino 3:12
That's most of the time, right?
Courtney Resch 3:13
Yeah. Yeah. It's basically you know, being a hairstylist, essentially.
Dominique Astorino 3:17
Oh, yeah. So you...
Courtney Resch 3:18
These are the conversations I thoroughly enjoy, clearly.
Dominique Astorino 3:21
Yeah, everyone's always unloading on you, huh?
Courtney Resch 3:23
Yeah. It's the best. And the worst. But the best.
Dominique Astorino 3:27
So like you're a therapist, and a hairstylist and a business owner. Can you just like, unpack all of that first, like, tell people who you are. And don't be afraid to brag?
Courtney Resch 3:37
Oh, man, you're funny. So yeah, I own a hair salon down in La Jolla, California.
Dominique Astorino 3:44
It's so beautiful.
Courtney Resch 3:45
It's very cute. Yeah, right at Windansea right by the water. I've been there for 15 years, taught classes all over teaching hair painting, balayag and taught in schools.I have a little two year old girl.
Dominique Astorino 4:01
Yeah, you do.
Courtney Resch 4:02
She's the cutest thing EVER.
Dominique Astorino 4:03
She's so cute little Liv. We speak to her in French too.
Courtney Resch 4:07
Yes. She speaks French. Well on her way!
Dominique Astorino 4:10
Yeah, she's speaks Fr... the most important words like when she's eating bread. She's like, "encore," again, more bread.
Courtney Resch 4:17
Bread. More bread!
Dominique Astorino 4:18
Love her.
Courtney Resch 4:19
She's the best. So yeah, just kind of mommin' out life at the moment and figuring out the balance of all the things and...
Dominique Astorino 4:27
Running a business
Courtney Resch 4:28
Running a business. And yeah, being mom, business, wife, recovering from traumatic brain injury.
Dominique Astorino 4:36
Yeah, that's what we're gonna get into a little bit today.
Courtney Resch 4:39
And just kind of, you know, figuring out how to balance all the things and find joy in this. Yeah. And do it. Do it where there's intention and joy, more than anything mixed in with it... now. Do I find joy in life with all of the things? Yeah, so yeah, that's where I'm at and just kind of trying to help people along the way. I have a lot of girls that work for me and have worked for me in the past. So I feel like conversations about women and for women and with women is so impactful and important and needs to happen a little bit more. That's why I feel like so lucky to be in the position I'm in with my job is that I have like a personal hand in the ability to connect with women and...
Dominique Astorino 5:23
Build them up.
Courtney Resch 5:24
Yeah, build them up and see, give them you know, kind of a different point of view or someone to like look up to in a healthy kind of way of that this is actually achievable.
Dominique Astorino 5:35
Yeah. I love that.
Courtney Resch 5:37
Yeah. So I think that... 'clients' is great, work is great. All that is a lot of work. It's awesome. But where I've found the most fulfillment in my entrepreneurial life is really is teaching people or helping people women specifically get to a more confident successful place and that seems to give me more back than actually doing hair and entrepreneurship.
Dominique Astorino 6:00
Amazing. Yeah, I love that. See, this is this is why I have you here today. Anyone listening is like holy shit. Like actually, like, Oh my god. Okay, so since we're kicking off trauma hour, I would just like to ask you like, how are you feeling? Are you excited? Are you nervous? Like what's going on in your world today?
Courtney Resch 6:20
Today? I'm slightly overwhelmed ... but you know, I start most days that way.
Dominique Astorino 6:24
So I'm in my natural habitat.
Courtney Resch 6:28
In the zone, you know, a vibe of where I'm at, or what I'm doing. I'm all good. When I'm there. Just the kind of the windup.
Dominique Astorino 6:35
Yeah, and your sunburn's healing.
Courtney Resch 6:37
sunburn's Healing. Yeah,
Dominique Astorino 6:38
you had a fun time in the ER at the other night.
Courtney Resch 6:41
It's cool. You know, just throw a little er mix and like, work. And...
Dominique Astorino 6:45
would it be an average month...
Courtney Resch 6:46
The normal busy life, and just like fully lose it?
Dominique Astorino 6:50
Oh, yeah. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good.
Courtney Resch 6:51
Oh, good, I'm fine!.
Dominique Astorino 6:52
Yeah, good. Something that I love.... Something I love that you brought up is funny, because we just recorded Episode Two with Dr. Kevin Gilliland, who is a clinical psychologist, we love him, he was just kind of talking about finding joy in the struggle and how a lot of times we think that they have to exist separately, they're mutually exclusive. But you kind of just brought that up, like finding joy in the struggle and how we can feel like a mess and still be an inspiration to other people. And I think that is such a cool thing. Because you really are such an inspiration to so many people. And I'm not just saying that because we're friends and I'm gassing you up on a podcast. But like you to like on the surface like everyone looking at you can be like down, she really has her shit together. Like she's so pretty. She's dressed while she owns a business. She's married. She's got a super cute baby a super cute dogs. She lives in La Jolla. She just rolled up here and her like Gucci boots on her Range Rover, like she's crushing life. And then at the same time, like, like, we were just on my couch being like, I had to go to the ER because my skin's coming off in a sunburn.
Courtney Resch 7:55
Like, in my head. I'm like, failing at all the things every day.
Dominique Astorino 7:58
That's the thing. And you told me that true because it is like I'm failing things in my head. Yeah, that other people on the outside would never know. And it's like, oh, it's because all of us are going through that same kind of experience.
Courtney Resch 8:09
Yep. And that's what I mean about just being able to kind of have a platform of women in front of me, I think has really helped me realize that you just have to keep going, you get through, right? And the most that you can do is show that you can get through because you don't really realize that so many people or people in general are looking up to you or looking at you even...
Dominique Astorino 8:36
Yeah, and now your daughter on top of all of that, like the very earliest memories she's gonna have in her whole life are forming right now watching you... no pressure
Courtney Resch 8:43
Which is like actually BIGGEST pressure. Like ever?!
Dominique Astorino 8:47
you're fine. It's fine.
Courtney Resch 8:48
And I know, she's amazing. But it's more or less the pressure of providing her that happy, you know, joyful childhood experience, but also get life done and feel fulfilled myself.
Dominique Astorino 9:04
Yeah. So yeah, still being an individual
Courtney Resch 9:06
And enjoying my life, but also give her the best childhood that she deserves her memories that she deserves and contentment and those kinds of things. So, I feel like the most important part of the daily struggle is just to know, you just got to get out of the house.
Dominique Astorino 9:24
Yeah...
Courtney Resch 9:25
You gotta get out of the house.
Dominique Astorino 9:26
Yes, the psychologist literally just said this too
Courtney Resch 9:29
You gotta get out into the environment, because I found that once I get out of the house and into any environment, I'm around other women or people that 90% of the time will make me feel better, or I'll make them feel better with what I'm going through. Yep. And then ultimately, that makes me feel better.
Dominique Astorino 9:45
Yeah, it's that validation that bond, you can share it.
Courtney Resch 9:48
Human interaction. And connection and talking and I think during COVID We kind of all got a little bit more comfortable talking about our worries and our anxieties and fears. And I think that there's a lot of strength that comes with that in life, you know, and especially, just getting through the days and you know, life is hard right now. And the world is kind of sad. And things are tough. But really, what's most important is just, you know, human connection, knowing that we're all have good days and bad. And yeah, me and my Range Rover and my cute car and my beautiful Gucci boots. We still have hard days,
Dominique Astorino 10:27
we have hard days in those boots; walk a day in these boots, it's not all sunshine!
Courtney Resch 10:32
Some days I wake up, and I'm like, I'm fucking queen. Other days I'm like, I'm a fucking loser. But I really am a queen. And we're gonna get there soon, I just got to get out of the house.
Dominique Astorino 10:42
Yeah, it's a mix of both. Do you think that like being more open with... like honest and upfront with the times that are hard, make it easier for you to get back to the moments where you feel more queenly?
Courtney Resch 10:55
I feel like it gives people around me that or that work for me, or clients or family, whatever. It allows me to be softer and kinder to myself, because I feel that I'm being honest with everyone around me. So when people would the pressures of like what you just said, right? I have all these people are all of these things, the pressures of life and your kids and you know, people that work for you, or people that you work for? Yeah, those pressures are a lot and went and when that kind of gets broken down to a word, just both people.
Dominique Astorino 11:34
that's permission to also be honest,
Courtney Resch 11:36
Right? We're both here on this planet together, right? My path led me to a different place than yours did. It doesn't mean that it wasn't hard or right. It wasn't a struggle, or, you know, like, I didn't have bad days also, in the fact that you do is that's okay, and you can still be in this place as I am or where you want to be with those days as well. Yeah,
Dominique Astorino 12:02
I feel like sometimes we're supposed to like, or we think we're supposed to pretend to not have those problems.
Courtney Resch 12:08
I don't know. I've gotten a lot of feedback on that. And yes, I'm torn sometimes, because I've gotten feedback from female therapists that I've been through been to over the years that have said, you know, no show about work every day, like you are a queen, and you are, you know, on top of all of it, and nothing is affecting you. And you've got this and nothing's anything but perfect. And, and I do understand that. And I think that that's very important. Because part of it's why you do get out of the house every day. Yeah. And you show up in a role. And that role in that character that you play every day at work is one that is important, because sometimes it actually snaps you out of your own head. Which is hard some days, but it's also really good. But then there's the side where I've, I don't know, is that real? What if I'm not feeling like that person that day? Or if I'm not feeling like a leader? How do I lead people when I don't feel like a leader? Right? So it's like, do I just show up and pretend that everything's great? Or, or do I say I'm having a really hard time and I show up with no makeup on, looking like a mess?
Dominique Astorino 13:14
I feel like either. Yeah, so actually, I've done this experiment. Just how did that go for you?
Courtney Resch 13:20
I found that right in the middle is the sweet spot, right? You got to show up looking good. You got to show up period. Yeah, you have to present yourself in a certain way. Whether or not you're feeling like you deserve it, or that is you. Yeah, you have to show up in a certain way. And then once you show up, you can communicate your struggles and communicate to those people what you're feeling and how you're feeling because they also showed up and they also 90% of the time are also feeling some... it was hard for them to get there as well.
Dominique Astorino 13:52
Yeah, totally. So I mean, that's how we bonded right? Yeah. You know, it's like a true get you a girl who can do both like she shows up like a queen but she's also gonna tell you all their shit that's going down. So then it like I was saying like permission for other people to share as well and not have to fake it
Courtney Resch 14:08
Well I'm like like she can do it and I can do it
Dominique Astorino 14:10
exactly right. Like she can still be happy and joyful and successful and giving and loving to other people. So we first bonded my very first appointment with you. So Hailey, if you're listening thank you so much for referring me to Courtney to get my hair done, because it just blossomed into this beautiful friendship and now we literally live like three feet from each other
Courtney Resch 14:34
Best thing ever.
Dominique Astorino 14:35
Yeah. So we live in a commune. It's just us and our dogs and family. When I say family I mean your family because I'm alone.
Courtney Resch 14:45
I need to start, like a mom tok.
Dominique Astorino 14:47
Do we need some more wine? Mom Tok? Yeah, no, tell me more
Courtney Resch 14:50
A mormon mom....
Dominique Astorino 14:51
Oh, I heard about the drama but I am so out of it. Thank you for this wine. Okay,
Courtney Resch 14:56
We all live in the same apartment complex.
Dominique Astorino 14:57
Alright, if you're listening at home and you're drinking with us it's time to pour another.
Courtney Resch 15:01
Yeah, cheers.
Dominique Astorino 15:02
So Dan, can you get this sound? I'm talking to our producer while we're recording. I'm just gonna do this in front of microphone... *pour noise*. Oh, yeah, that's the good stuff. All right. Cheers.
Courtney Resch 15:14
Cheers.
Dominique Astorino 15:14
Like, can I make a clinking noise too? This isn't even sound effects. We're doing it live. Again, okay, more cowbell. Cool. So we get back to our regularly scheduled programming
Courtney Resch 15:29
We live three feet from each other.
Dominique Astorino 15:30
Yeah, totally. And we this all started with an appointment, which is literally like, we're just talking about how you give this space a safe space for women, men, whoever comes through your door to kind of unwind a little bit feel like they're taken care of feel like they're seen. And that's kind of what we're trying to do here. But this is where our friendship started. Because I started talking about some stuff I had been going through leading up to that point. And you opened up about something really gnarly that I think a lot of people would feel more seen and supported. If you shared a little bit about today, if you're comfortable. I'm just going to keep liquoring you up until you...
Courtney Resch 16:04
Look at this point in my life, which is kind of nice, because you know, you know, you have nothing to hide once you've kind of overcome some things. Yeah, I'm just here, you know, and I'm happy to be here. My struggles. And the things that I have been through are what got me here. And so I feel like, you know, the hardest times in life are really what leads you to a place of contentment. I truly think that right? It's also what leads people to, it leads people to me, right? Yeah. So you came to me that night, and there's times that I share things, and there's times I don't write, it kind of depends on the mood. But really, a lot of it is like I'm 35 years old. I have a lot of people and clients and women that are in my world that are younger, and my 20s were hard. They were fun, super fun, super fun. Really, really, really really fun! But with that being said, you know, the insecurities in your own brain as a female without having that partner or having found that place that you feel like every person woman especially is told that they need to find right, yeah, the husband, the career that correct path and that confidence, the house, the all of those things in your 20s is really hard because it's ultimately you're just like, it's a very purgatory state of life. In time, in life. Yeah, it's like, okay, I have a lot of confidence that this person in this life that I envisioned for myself is going to happen. But isn't yet. So how can you be this like confident, strong, like really understood, worldly woman when you haven't lived that yet? And that's okay that you haven't! Because you're in your 20s Yeah, so just chill out. Everything's fine. Early. 30s. Just like chill. Yeah.
Dominique Astorino 18:06
Oh, thank you for that I needed a little bit of that
Courtney Resch 18:09
Honestly, like, if I could just go back and take like, three seconds each day to just tell myself, none of this really matters yet...
Dominique Astorino 18:19
This is fine.
Courtney Resch 18:20
It's fine. Yeah, this is fine.
Dominique Astorino 18:22
This is fine.
Courtney Resch 18:23
Even the struggle is fine. It's impossible in the moment to tell yourself that or to you know, it's it's like we we read all the things we listen to the podcasts, but when you're in it, it's hard
Dominique Astorino 18:36
So hard
Courtney Resch 18:36
It's so hard.
Dominique Astorino 18:37
Like even getting out of the house sometimes like we both went through that...
Courtney Resch 18:40
It's SO hard
Dominique Astorino 18:40
like getting out for a walk...
Courtney Resch 18:41
Are you going this way about your relationship or someone you're dating or your family? And it impacts every other thing in your life? And is it okay that I let this circumstance in my life overshadow the potential to enjoy life or the good things? The fact that I'm stressed out about something going on with my family? Am I going to cancel the fun concert I was invited to tomorrow, or today?
Dominique Astorino 19:06
Which would make you feel so much better
Courtney Resch 19:08
right? But like, I can't, because I feel like I can't in my mind. So I think a lot of where I've come to in this point, I've been almost 36 is just knowing or knowing that the struggle is actually what leads you to that place. Understanding and contentment and joy...
Dominique Astorino 19:28
For the greater good.
Courtney Resch 19:29
Yeah. And then ability to like help other women see the light when they're in it. So you know, when I have these with clients and younger women and girls that come to me, I feel like they share certain things. I'm like, okay, yeah, that's hard. But you're still really young. So you're not through it yet!
Dominique Astorino 19:49
You got a lot of time.
Courtney Resch 19:50
Right. You got a lot of time, but also like, there's more to come, but you can have all of these things with that too. So my whole thing is is like look, I've been through this, this and this right, which was hard. I had a...
Dominique Astorino 20:06
Let's break it down.
Courtney Resch 20:07
Okay, so let's break it down. A few, four, years ago I had a head on car accident or seizure that caused a head on car accident
Dominique Astorino 20:15
While you were driving
Courtney Resch 20:15
While I was driving, which resulted in a TBI, pretty bad traumatic brain injury, a broken back, a compression fracture, three vertebrae tore all the tendons and ligaments in my left ankle.
Dominique Astorino 20:31
Super cool.
Courtney Resch 20:32
I'm like, what else? is the main thing...
Dominique Astorino 20:35
you have ever had a seizure before?
Courtney Resch 20:37
I've never had a seizure before.
Did they ever figure that out?
I was 28, it's 5:30pm on a Wednesday, was just driving ... my brand new Frenchie puppy that was six weeks old and my three day old brand new Jaguar SUV. So I was like, at the prime of my life...
Dominique Astorino 20:44
Thriving.
Courtney Resch 20:57
I had just partnered with my business partner and he had paid a decent amount of money for the percentage that he bought. So I was like, okay, life is good
Dominique Astorino 21:06
Riding on a high
Courtney Resch 21:07
Yeah, I did it! So I took the money that I got from that partnership and bought myself my first nice car, right? I've pretty much well, yeah, I've gotten myself to this place in my life, from a lot of diving into work to distract from other things in life and family and things like that. So work for me, it's always been like, not just a safe space, but always something that yeah, my time was being spent there. But it was something that was giving back to me and I was giving it to people when you show yeah, it was mutual. So it was fueling my soul in a way that was far more than money could Yeah, so it felt like a healthy distraction. So then come 28 I've been you know, working 12 hour days and diving so hard into work and then also still, like having a life with friends. And, you know, yeah, being young
Dominique Astorino 21:58
Doing it!
Courtney Resch 21:59
drinking and doing all the things and the concerts and travel and, but you know, it's like I came to this place. Okay, I was 28 all the things I had. Okay, my my hard work was finally paying off. Right? It was my time to just relax and enjoy. The business partner bought the ... so I finally treated myself bought myself a really nice car.
Dominique Astorino 22:21
I would do it too. I did it without the business partner...
Courtney Resch 22:24
BOOM!
Dominique Astorino 22:25
Yeah, just out of nowhere.
Courtney Resch 22:27
I bought myself a car three days. It was literally three days old. And just driving straight with my little brand new Frenchie puppy in the passenger seat.
Dominique Astorino 22:36
Thank GOD He's okay.
Courtney Resch 22:37
Thank God. Well, okay.
Dominique Astorino 22:39
Yeah, a loose term. He's doing okay. Yeah.
Courtney Resch 22:43
But yeah, just driving straight in a couple blocks from my house and work. And next thing I know, I woke up in a hospital. And they told me I had a seizure. And a head on car accident and had broken my back. So I'm laying in an emergency room, hospital bed. And they're like, Where were you going?
Dominique Astorino 23:04
Oh, my God. No idea.
Courtney Resch 23:06
I'm like I have no idea. And then I looked over and there's my cute little Frenchie puppy. In the ER. With all the ER doctors.
Dominique Astorino 23:13
Awww!
Courtney Resch 23:13
I was like oh my God yeah, there he is. I was going to the dog park. So then I kind of came back. That's where I was going. And so yeah, just long story short, they never... apparently a lot of women have what's called a single onset seizure in their life. Yeah, it's very common, essentially. Or not, essentially, it's very common, apparently. For women between the ages. I think it's like 20 and 35. Yeah, to have what's called a single onset seizure. Yeah.
Dominique Astorino 23:42
Wow. So cool. You're driving
Courtney Resch 23:44
Obviously no one ever told. Told me it's very common.
Dominique Astorino 23:46
I've never heard that. And yeah, and I work in this field.
Courtney Resch 23:50
It's crazy. There was no answers as to why still isn't... that's been hard to let go of right. The lack of control the lack of reason, the lack of
Dominique Astorino 23:59
the why
Courtney Resch 23:59
explanation, the why Yeah, the why really was was really hard until finally, a month later, after the accident. My therapist was like, you just have to let go. Like it's just an accident... accidents. The word accident was made or or came to for a reason. And it just happens. There is no explanation. You just have to let go.
Dominique Astorino 24:19
That's such a human thing to want to apply meaning to everything.
Courtney Resch 24:22
And that's me.
Dominique Astorino 24:22
Yeah
Courtney Resch 24:23
I'm like, okay, so this happened, why and how can I prevent it from happening again? is this something I need to be concerned about in the future?
Dominique Astorino 24:30
Right, very logical. Yeah, very action oriented.
Courtney Resch 24:33
And knock off all of the basic things about seizure that can cause it, right, like drug withdrawal, right? Lack of sleep, right? Epilepsy, pre existing conditions, right, all of those things when you cross those off, and those aren't the factors that lead to it. It's really hard to wrap your brain around as to "why?" — especially when I'm in like the best place so I thought in my life
Dominique Astorino 24:55
healthy, succeeding happy,
Courtney Resch 24:57
right. What is the lesson here? Yeah, Why did really bad things happen to good people to good people when they're in a good time in their life? Right. And how are you supposed to in the moment? In the moment, especially, it's really hard, obviously. But how are you supposed to come over that? When you don't know why.
Dominique Astorino 25:17
It feels senseless
Courtney Resch 25:18
right? It's like why me? So I had a period of time where it was very much like, this isn't fair. This isn't fair. Right? Why me? And this isn't fair.
Dominique Astorino 25:28
And it's not that's true
Courtney Resch 25:30
right, It's not it's simply not. But I think where I've come to from it, and why I've led the path that I have since is just that, why it happened. And that it's not fair is that it had to happen to me for a reason so that I can, because I have this platform, and ability to talk to people and give advice back and make them feel good. That's why it happened to me. So that all I can do is talk about it and show people here I am now.
Dominique Astorino 25:57
Yep.
Courtney Resch 25:58
And this can happen to you too
Dominique Astorino 25:59
You can do it
Courtney Resch 26:00
And you can do it too. Because in the moment, it was hard. And how did I get through it? I listened to podcasts of people that are going through a TBI. Yeah, I mean, healing your body when you've known nothing different but have been somewhat healthy is really mind blowing. Because when you're young, you don't really think about so many things about A) the medical system, right? Health insurance doctors...
Dominique Astorino 26:23
which is its own thing.
Courtney Resch 26:27
But you know, I was just like healthy, young, working, having fun. Yeah, you know, early 20s 20s. Girl, enjoying my life.
Dominique Astorino 26:35
And then you went into all this
Courtney Resch 26:37
Right. And my life became doctor's appointments and healing
Dominique Astorino 26:39
and not just like a little sick
Courtney Resch 26:40
And I still owned a business, and had a dog and had a house that I had to pay for And all of these things.
Dominique Astorino 26:46
Ended up getting married
Courtney Resch 26:48
Ended up getting married. Yeah, I just started dating my now husband right before the accident.
Dominique Astorino 26:52
So hi, Nick.
Courtney Resch 26:56
So yeah, accident was March. And we got engaged in November. And I think largely because, you know, we're programmed these days to do it all as women, right, like, be independent. Do it, all have the business, Have all of the things, look this certain way, And don't ask for help.
Dominique Astorino 27:14
Yeah, that's a big thing.
Courtney Resch 27:16
Right! It's like, it's all kind of up to you if I can do it. And I And then so can you. Right, but also, like, not everyone can do it the same way. Not everyone has the same support system.
Dominique Astorino 27:26
And no one's doing it without help.
Courtney Resch 27:27
Right! And yeah, exactly. And how does one ask for help when they don't feel that they really have people there that can help them?
Dominique Astorino 27:36
Yeah. Or feel like they deserve it?
Courtney Resch 27:38
Right!
Dominique Astorino 27:38
Like they can't ask for help
Courtney Resch 27:39
Exactly. Or you've just been programmed to do it all yourself your whole life.
Dominique Astorino 27:43
Did the accident change that perspective for you?
Courtney Resch 27:45
Hmm, good question. Yes. But I still think that how... Yeah, I'm a big believer in helping all the things now,
right. Yeah. If you need something you've been teaching me for a while now
always I always say like, don't leave it all up to yourself. There's just no way.
Dominique Astorino 28:02
It's impossible
Courtney Resch 28:02
there's no way it's impossible. And there's people out there that are better at it than you, and you need to utilize them. But with that being said, to utilize those people requires you to find them. And that's a lot of work.
Dominique Astorino 28:14
There's a little bit of initiative required
Courtney Resch 28:16
Right, The only .... reason why I'm at where I'm at is because of I finally found good doctors that helped me figure it out.
Dominique Astorino 28:24
And that took a while
Courtney Resch 28:25
that took a while but it also took all my own research and doing
Dominique Astorino 28:29
Yeah, and when you're already like you had a brain injury,
Courtney Resch 28:32
right, exactly.
Dominique Astorino 28:33
which comes with its own thing of like brain fog, inability to concentrate, PAIN, fatigue, all these things. And on top of that, you have to research a brand new medical team,
Courtney Resch 28:43
right? Because I'm being told, you know, you're fine. We don't know why you had a seizure we put on the EEG Yeah, you know, what I learned in the whole process is really interesting in my neurologist told me this, actually is that they know more about the about Mars and outer space than they do about the human brain.
Dominique Astorino 29:01
Damn.
Courtney Resch 29:01
Yeah, the actual imaging technology for the brain is just not there yet. Because a lot of functions that from the brain that affect the body, and affect mental health, and all those other things are caused by actual brain waves, right? So those are really hard for them to track. So seizures happen. They don't really know why they happen. But what happens and why it happens is because it's a misfiring of neurons from one side of your brain to the other. So the most that they can do is just put wires on you to see whether or not you have seizure activity in your brainwaves. Okay, that requires what's called an EEG, right? So it's like, I don't know...
Dominique Astorino 29:45
Electroencephalograms?
Courtney Resch 29:46
Stickers stuck to your, you know, to your skull and you have to wear this like, heavy kind of almost like cell phone slash ...
Dominique Astorino 29:54
Like a pager?
Courtney Resch 29:55
A pager! On your side. Yes.
Dominique Astorino 29:56
Does anyone know what a pager is today?
Courtney Resch 29:58
For a couple of days and And my neurologist was like, Yeah, you know, we can do that. But what if you have seizure activity in hour 49? Right, right. We only have those on for 48 hours we can or there's no way we don't have the technology to, to [...]. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. And until they do well, there's it's still going to be this guessing game. Right.
Dominique Astorino 30:17
And it might never show up
Courtney Resch 30:18
It might never show up. Yeah. Right. So that it is hard. It was hard. But ultimately, I finally found a doctor. I do my own research from that specializes in post concussion syndrome, went and saw him which took me seven months to get the appointment.
Dominique Astorino 30:33
So seven months after your accident took more than half a year for you to find...
Courtney Resch 30:38
Under the care of a neurologist. Right. Yeah. So I went to her and I'm like, but I'm having really bad vertigo and migraines. falling over.
Dominique Astorino 30:45
Yeah, forgetting where you're going.
Courtney Resch 30:47
I look at you and you're spinning one way like, and I'm spinning on the opposite direction. And it just hits you like vertigo. I don't wish that upon my worst enemy it's the worst thing in the entire world. Your vision goes black in one eye, well for me it did anyways. And it's super debilitating. Like you can't do anything. So you're alive. Okay, you survive this. Healed your broken back. You healed your ankle. You've healed so many things, ligaments, like months down the line. Yeah. But you're having vertigo migraines, which are equally if not more debilitating than the actual other injuries right, which were physically debilitating.
Dominique Astorino 31:25
Vestibular migraine, right? I already forgot.
Courtney Resch 31:28
I don't really remember? Because they were always together with the vertigo. Yeah, so the migraines would kind of come together. So I was having that went to my neurologist that I was under the care of after accident and she was like, You're fine.
Dominique Astorino 31:41
You're fine. Everything's fine.
Courtney Resch 31:42
Yeah, we did all that we could do medic that we are supposed to do medically, which is to see whether or not you why you had the seizure and whether or not you're epileptic, which I wasn't because I didn't have another one. Yeah, so long story short, do my own research, find another neurologist that specializes in post concussion. Went to him he's like, you have a full blown brain injury, your vision is off. And you have like, next to ... next to no vision in one eye. Wow, lost hearing and most in one year 80% of lost 80% of my short term memory. Okay. For like equilibrium was off. Like I was asked to close my eyes and walk on a tape on the ground. In a line
Dominique Astorino 32:20
like the drunk test.
Courtney Resch 32:21
Thought I had nailed it. I was the other side of the room. Yeah, like so many things that were clearly off.
Dominique Astorino 32:28
And the doctor just was like...
Courtney Resch 32:30
She just was like, You came to me for seizure. I treated you for seizure. And your concussion was not what you came to me for.
Dominique Astorino 32:38
With all due respect. What an asshole. Like
Courtney Resch 32:40
I mean, what we're talking like UCSD very prominent, really, really good. Really, really good neurologist. And this is not her fault, right? She's inundated with work. She, I came to her first seizure. She does not have the time to look over my emergency room report and see that I also had a concussion and maybe that these things are from... granted. She should
Dominique Astorino 33:02
yeah, I'm like what you're saying is logical, but also...
Courtney Resch 33:04
You have to be an advocate for your own [health].
Dominique Astorino 33:05
Yeah, that's the biggest lesson. Yes, yeah. And they're not taking care of you in America.
Courtney Resch 33:10
Both of us. It takes a doctor and you you have to almost self diagnose some things and go to these doctors.
Dominique Astorino 33:16
And that's hard too
Courtney Resch 33:17
it is hard!
Dominique Astorino 33:18
because that doctors don't take you seriously when you do that. They're like ... "Doctor Google"
Courtney Resch 33:20
They don't. Yeah, you have to find another one. Yeah, you have to and you know, gone are the days that we just go to the doctor. Yeah. And they just tell us, right, that trust factor for me is gone.
Dominique Astorino 33:33
Totally
Courtney Resch 33:33
Totally gone. Yeah. And it has been up to me this whole time to figure out kind of, but seeing him Dr. Alexander, if you're listening, thank you.
Dominique Astorino 33:43
You're the best. We love you.
Courtney Resch 33:46
He was like you know, you know you have a full blown TBI and you need to go to brain rehabilitation.
Dominique Astorino 33:51
So when you when you got that diagnosis, did you already know what a TBI was?
Courtney Resch 33:55
No.
Dominique Astorino 33:55
How did they explain that to you?
Courtney Resch 33:58
It got explained to me when I entered brain rehabilitation
Dominique Astorino 34:03
Brain camp!
Courtney Resch 34:03
Brain camp. Yep.
Dominique Astorino 34:06
So it's technically NOT called Brain camp?
Courtney Resch 34:09
No it's called Brain rehabilitation.
Dominique Astorino 34:11
I've been calling it brain cramp this whole time
Courtney Resch 34:13
I called it brain camp. oh my god it's kind of makes a puts like a like a fun little thing in there. But it's ...
Dominique Astorino 34:23
Trauma with a fun spin!
Courtney Resch 34:24
Yeah. But so not fun. Yeah. The only way to get through it was call it a camp.
Dominique Astorino 34:30
I'm fine
Courtney Resch 34:31
I'm fine. Fine. Totally fine. And everyone is looking at you. Like you're fine. Yeah, totally fine.
Dominique Astorino 34:36
Fer sherrr.
Courtney Resch 34:38
I'm here and why are that like what I should be doing? But it's cool I'm fine.
Dominique Astorino 34:42
Like one eye is just twitching.
Courtney Resch 34:45
The half of your face but it's cool.
Dominique Astorino 34:46
Everything's good. Yeah.
Courtney Resch 34:49
But yeah, so brain injuries and TBI is are a very life altering. Unspoken invisible. Disease or injury which is the hardest part is that I did look fine, right? I had healed when I had my back right? I would have taken the broken back over the brain injury 10 times. Because the broken back you could see if you sent me you could obviously tell I had a steel cage like a steel cage, like brace on
Dominique Astorino 35:18
Enveloping your whole body
Courtney Resch 35:20
Yeah, it was very
Dominique Astorino 35:22
Like Regina George.
Courtney Resch 35:23
Totally. And a full blown like knee like, boot up to my knees. So it's like, definitely looks like a full blown crash victim for seven months. But that was it. It's not what I mean. Yes. It's nice to get sympathy. Let's be real, right?
Dominique Astorino 35:38
Because people are more patient with you. People are more understanding. Like it's the stuff that we want everyday. But it is just like cut us a break.
Courtney Resch 35:44
Yeah, the hardest part was when the cast and the brace went away. And people will see you as least suffering in my head
Dominique Astorino 35:50
if not more!
Courtney Resch 35:51
if not more. Yeah, but the actual injury had been healed. So that was hard, is hard. Yeah. And I feel like a lot of people suffer from things like that, that you can't see.
Dominique Astorino 36:01
Totally, I was just gonna say I think people with mental illness will really relate to this as well. Anyone who struggles with depression, anxiety, bipolar disease, schizophrenia
Courtney Resch 36:07
Any of it. Yeah, it's hard. And the feeling, although what you may, well may depress you or give you anxiety or pain is far vastly different from each other. Right? But the feeling is exactly the same
totally. it just is life altering
It doesn't matter what causes it or why you are depressed or why you feel that way. It doesn't matter. you're feeling it the same. Yeah. And no one can see it. And it's hard, really hard. So I remember the whole invisible disease thing was interesting when I heard that about TBI, because it's like, oh, yeah, I wish people could see it. Yeah, yeah. I mean, sympathy goes a long way. And understanding goes a long way.
Dominique Astorino 36:47
Patience.
Courtney Resch 36:48
And just truly, I mean, everyone always says this, right? You never know what anyone's going through. Yeah, struggles people are going through. And that's so true. Yeah. And just physically wise, you don't know
Dominique Astorino 37:00
you have no idea
Courtney Resch 37:00
right? You don't know what they're physically going through or feeling
Dominique Astorino 37:04
mentally, emotionally.
Courtney Resch 37:05
Right. So my whole life path is just to show you anyone that comes in my path that it's gonna be okay. You can be me with any struggle in life, or you can be you also have the best version of you, with whatever you're going through now, yeah, and instill with those, right, I still have things from my brain injury, I still have bad days and anxious days, and, but I show up, I'm here got through it. And I'm here to offer a compassionate place for women to live life and hopefully learn from
Dominique Astorino 37:40
and become stronger.
Courtney Resch 37:41
Yeah
Dominique Astorino 37:41
I feel like you are the perfect example of someone who can go through something really, really hard. And concurrently at the same time, not instead of, or after or whatever, still have joyful experiences. And both things can be true concurrently, right, like you went through this awful thing. And at the same time, you found the love of your life, and you had your puppy, and you ended up having a baby, like all of these really joyful things happened for you. Like you were saying with the concert. Like if you're, you know, if you had stuff going on with your family, could you still go to the concert, like in this period of your time of your life? Rather, you had so much going on physically, emotionally, mentally, right, you're in so much pain, but you didn't let that stop you from experiencing joy and other areas of your life.
Courtney Resch 38:27
I just had to keep going.
Dominique Astorino 38:29
Yeah.
Courtney Resch 38:30
Right. And I think that's too right with as women like we have to push through. Yeah, you have to mean, what else are you gonna do? Right.
Dominique Astorino 38:38
I mean, I guess like, let yourself drown?
Courtney Resch 38:41
pushing through knowing that this was gonna get me somewhere. And just knew that there was something better to come from it. And that's what I always try to tell, you know, anyone that that is maybe having a hard day or a hard time in life, like, I do believe that people are put on this earth to go through hard things to teach others.
Dominique Astorino 39:04
Yeah, I agree.
Courtney Resch 39:05
And if it's not teaching, it's leading. With an open mind.
Dominique Astorino 39:08
Totally.
Courtney Resch 39:08
I find myself too. I think I'm a pretty open minded person.
Dominique Astorino 39:11
Yeah, I can I can vouch for that.
Courtney Resch 39:14
I just, you know, I respect everyone's path. I trust that if you have come across mine, you're meant to be there for a reason. And I just think that you can control so many things, and what you can control and even sometimes you can't control that. It's like you're... the mind is a very, very powerful thing. I think that
Dominique Astorino 39:37
You know that more than most people
Courtney Resch 39:38
How your mind is a true healer or the opposite thereof?
Dominique Astorino 39:44
Yeah. Can be your biggest enemy. Yeah
Courtney Resch 39:46
Yeah. So when you've gone through something like that, you tend to see relationships with people for a whole in a whole different light.
Dominique Astorino 39:54
Yeah. Do you think it made me more compassionate and patient with other people?
Courtney Resch 39:57
No, no.
Dominique Astorino 40:00
Absolutely not cool cool cool.
Courtney Resch 40:02
In fact, it made it almost on the opposite side, which I'm working on. Because I'm like, I've been through this and, and you're complaining about, you know, your tire that is flat, right? I'm like, over it. Yeah. But also back to them is a really big deal. And it disrupts their life in their day. And that's okay.
Dominique Astorino 40:22
And they might have something else going on that makes the tire a bigger deal
Courtney Resch 40:24
Whatever is causing them to feeling this way doesn't matter.
Dominique Astorino 40:27
Yeah
Courtney Resch 40:27
it doesn't matter. It's that they're feeling that way and let's
Dominique Astorino 40:30
honor it
Courtney Resch 40:30
let them live that feeling and make them feel better. Despite why,
Dominique Astorino 40:34
yeah, I love that. So so the answer was actually yes...
Courtney Resch 40:37
Yes, yes. Yeah.
Dominique Astorino 40:38
And in a roundabout way, it's like bringing you to that point. You know, all of this makes me kind of wonder, and I don't have an answer for this. Shocking. Do you think that our shared struggles and traumas and sorrows strengthen our relationships with others more than our joys?
Courtney Resch 40:56
Hmm, yes, yeah, definitely. Unfortunately.
Dominique Astorino 40:59
I was just thinking, like, we really bonded over something really hard. You and Nick went through that really hard thing together, like he was there for you while you went through something really traumatic. And it strengthened your relationship, when you go through all of what you've been through. And then you help someone else who's gone through it, too. Like you're now using this as your leadership kind of platform almost. Right for like teaching and connecting with others, you're connecting over that shared, traumatic experience versus like a joyful triumph. And it's not to say that we can't have those things with other people. But I'm wondering if this is kind of like, the glue between humanity is our shared struggle?
Courtney Resch 41:32
I think, absolutely.
Dominique Astorino 41:34
Yeah.
Courtney Resch 41:34
I think it helps people bond. But it also, I think it's imperative to understand and see the light the big picture. Yeah. Right. Like the struggle is what bonds people but it's also what brings you to where you are, right? So I am who I am now and able to enjoy the life that I have. Because I know that I have this life now because of that, right? Because of that struggle,
Dominique Astorino 42:05
because of the pain you've experienced and overcome.
Courtney Resch 42:07
So use your those things in like a positive way, then then you just suffer? Yeah, right. And you struggle,
Dominique Astorino 42:15
then it's really suffering without meaning — you're looking for the why, right? This is the why
Courtney Resch 42:20
this is the why
Dominique Astorino 42:21
you can use it as raw material,
Courtney Resch 42:23
but you can't really see it. Yeah, but
Dominique Astorino 42:25
And that's okay.
Courtney Resch 42:25
And that's okay. How can no one I mean, how can you expect someone to see something that they don't know? Is there, right? Right. You just have to know that the struggles if if God or life or a greater power, whoever your person is, or spirit is that you believe in has put this time in your life, it's because it's meant for you to do more, or you to be in a different place,
Dominique Astorino 42:49
use it for good
Courtney Resch 42:50
place will come or that person will come or that time will come. You just have to trust when you're in life in the moment that you're there for a reason. Yeah. And you have to be actually there and be present. And just live life as it is in front of you whether it's good or bad. And just get through. period.
Dominique Astorino 43:10
period. You can't drop the mic, because it's attached, attached to a pole
Courtney Resch 43:15
You gotta get through.
Dominique Astorino 43:16
And also Dan would be very upset. Sorry, I wonder what this conversation would have been like, if instead of rosé we had Canns here.
Courtney Resch 43:23
Oh, I love me a good Cann
Dominique Astorino 43:25
that's that's for next time.
Courtney Resch 43:26
That's the other thing. Yeah. It's like, you know, people have dealt with a lot of family related, you know, substance and [...] and kind of alcoholism and things like that, too. And so there's a whole other weight of the world that lies on my shoulders with every decision I make, or anyone in my world makes that's anything substance related. Yeah. So that's the other thing is you come to a point when you become 35, that you're like, Oh, I trust that you're going to do what's best for you. Yeah. And if you don't, or if you're trying to figure it out, that's okay. I'm here to like, I got your back. Regardless, I'm not going to judge you if you drink wine at the end of your day. Or if you smoke weed, or if you take whatever you do, it doesn't matter. I trust that you got to do what you got to do. Yeah, to get you to show up the next day. Yeah, you know, and, and luckily, I am fortunate to be in the position that I don't have that gene in me. Right, right. All three of my brothers do or two, two or three brothers do and that's hard. It's really hard. Yeah. And I feel really lucky that I'm able to have some coping mechanisms like drinking with my husband because it's fun. Yeah, and we enjoy it and we don't have a problem with it. Thank god yeah, thank God but you know, you do each person has to find their own thing to deal with there and deal with it. And that's okay. Whatever it is
Dominique Astorino 44:49
no judgment,
Courtney Resch 44:50
no judgment. Do your thing.
Dominique Astorino 44:52
Be healthy, be balanced.
Courtney Resch 44:53
Do whatever you have to do. No one else knows. don't have shame. Own your shit. Yeah. Take The gummies. Smoke the weeds, drink the drinks. All in moderation. You know? Yeah. The whole work day. Yeah. Right. It's it's like
Dominique Astorino 45:10
take a load off!
Courtney Resch 45:11
If we're doing it at 9am, maaayyyybeee you need something different but you know, just do what you gotta do.
Dominique Astorino 45:17
Yeah. Just come over and hang out with me and Courtney.
Courtney Resch 45:20
Yeah.
Dominique Astorino 45:20
Maybe on the patio with a firepit.
Courtney Resch 45:23
I'm all about treat yourself. So
Dominique Astorino 45:26
I know you are
Courtney Resch 45:26
yeah, all ahout treat yourself and have no shame in your game and just kind of do what you have to do to get through and be the best person that you need to be to show up. And if you do what you got to do, get the help. Take the things. Listen to the podcasts, read the books, you know, do the meditations go on the walks. Do the workouts. Yeah, some everyone is so different. And there's so much out there now, which is actually the coolest part is that there really are
Dominique Astorino 45:56
there are a lot of resources
Courtney Resch 45:57
There's so much out there now. There's so many things that are better than they ever were like, let's say, gummies. Yeah, right, right.
Dominique Astorino 46:04
I didn't have those 10 years ago, five years ago, two years ago,
Courtney Resch 46:07
I was prescribed Ambien, right when I was
Dominique Astorino 46:10
Oh, yeah.
Courtney Resch 46:11
My early 20s. And it was scary.
Dominique Astorino 46:14
Ambien's gnarly.
Courtney Resch 46:15
So scary.
Dominique Astorino 46:16
Yeah. And it's much gnarlier than a gummy.
Courtney Resch 46:19
Fully, like slept walk and slept cooked and all kinds of stuff. Yeah, really then introduced gummies, which is awesome. Right now there's these things because of research that people have done, probably because they suffered and struggled and needed help.
Dominique Astorino 46:35
I need some plants
Courtney Resch 46:36
on these things. Right. So my whole thing is like benefit from other people's hard work. Yeah. And take the gummies Yeah. Help. Right. Yeah. I mean, help someone created these things because they wanted them or saw a need for them. Yeah. And if that need fulfills yours, great.
Dominique Astorino 46:52
Brought to you by the Camino gummies in our fridge.
Courtney Resch 46:56
Thank you.
Dominique Astorino 46:57
Thank you so much. It's been an honor and a privilege. No, but actually, like, this is the best thank you. This. I'm so glad that everyone listening right now gets a dose of like, what I get from you on a regular basis. Like when I come over and I'm like, make me feel better.
Courtney Resch 47:10
Which always like anyone, any anyone that needs to feel better about any choice that they've made in life. I've got you.
Dominique Astorino 47:16
Yeah, like day one literally was like, didn't you want to be my best friend? Yes. Like as like kind of scaring me. kidding I'm kidding I'm fine. No, but actually, cheers again, to you and to this and to asking for help.
Courtney Resch 47:33
Cheers!
Dominique Astorino 47:34
Is that gonna be a gross noise?
Courtney Resch 47:36
I don't know. It's good question. Keep going. That's kind of my only advice. Just keep going. Yeah, keep this. Keep going. Keep going break it down to being like a baby again. You know, it's all about sleep hygiene. Yeah, it's all about the basics. Put your phone out in the other room.
Dominique Astorino 47:52
Oh, yeah, that's a big one.
Courtney Resch 47:54
Turn the lights off.
Dominique Astorino 47:54
Throw your phone in the garbage disposal.
Courtney Resch 47:56
Have a healthy sleep hygiene routine.
Dominique Astorino 47:58
Yeah, I need to get better at that.
Courtney Resch 48:00
Yeah, it's like literally you when I was in brain rehabilitation in the hospital. Literally, it's like, they break it down to you being a baby again. Don't do these things that we do for our kids
Dominique Astorino 48:11
I'm just a baby
Courtney Resch 48:12
Blackout drapes.
Dominique Astorino 48:13
Oh my god. Yeah
Courtney Resch 48:14
Noise machine! Distracting lights and stimulating things, get them out of the room so that your brain can shut off
Dominique Astorino 48:21
Just be a baby.
Courtney Resch 48:22
Take the brain outside of the ... separate your brain from your emotions and do what the brain needs because typically, most times yeah. Emotional things and feelings. Mental health is just a reaction to a physical problem or need.
Dominique Astorino 48:36
Wow.
Courtney Resch 48:37
Yeah. And in kids too. Right? My daughter has a huge as a tantrum and she's literally trying to pull off the glass shower doors off the truck.
Dominique Astorino 48:47
Oh, good!
Courtney Resch 48:47
As she's fully like, screaming bloody murder, which at that point as a parent. You're you're scared. Yeah. Right. Like I'm actually intercepting her because I'm scared that she's gonna like kill herself. Yeah, right so I'm not nothing about it is me trying to teach her lesson or get her to stop or? Really like yeah, oh my god, she can't control whatever is happening to her. Like what do I do
Dominique Astorino 49:12
Dude. That's why I don't have kids. I have no idea.
Courtney Resch 49:14
I mean shove her in the bath
Dominique Astorino 49:17
Right just like football tackle
Courtney Resch 49:19
like react some way and hope it ends but you know, in when that happened to me, which is a true story.
Dominique Astorino 49:25
Is this yesterday?
Courtney Resch 49:25
This is like a couple weeks ago. The next day I'm like helping her brush her teeth and I'm like, oh my god, there she is molars coming in. This was an emotional reaction to a physical thing.
Dominique Astorino 49:36
Totally
Courtney Resch 49:37
Tantrums, That's all tantrums are yeah, that's all most things are you know anxiety so love anxiety is my personal belief
Dominique Astorino 49:45
when like your needs aren't being met
Courtney Resch 49:46
a lot of those physical reactions. physical feelings that we feel are because of emotional things that are deep, deep set, or in their interest and vice versa. Really, like the emotional reaction to a physical feeling. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's interesting. It's also basic and we make it so hard on herself saying no, we twist it.
Dominique Astorino 50:06
Just be a baby. Just go to bed.
Courtney Resch 50:10
Just
Dominique Astorino 50:11
Just be a baby who likes weed gummies
Courtney Resch 50:13
if you have got insomnia, then put your phone in another room. Yeah. Put your go to bed early. Put your drapes up.
Dominique Astorino 50:21
You got me the...
Courtney Resch 50:21
Buy an Oura.
Dominique Astorino 50:22
Yeah, the Oura ring. Love that
Courtney Resch 50:27
white noise, but really the basics. try that first.
Dominique Astorino 50:30
I'm gonna go to bed at like nine tonight.
Courtney Resch 50:32
That's good.
Dominique Astorino 50:32
Yeah, thank you. Yeah, thank you for supporting my vision.
Courtney Resch 50:35
I go to bed at like 10. But before accident that with that being said before, what I do think is what caused seizure now is just that, right? Like, trying to figure out all of the things, but not really needing to figure out anything at all right? Lack of sleep, pressure, anxiety, social media. I truly believe that those pressures are what caused me to have that seizure.
Dominique Astorino 50:59
Damn. That's a pretty big revelation.
Courtney Resch 51:02
Yeah. And so there's a part of growing up that I've had to let go of the pressures of social media and being perfect in all aspects of my life. Yeah, had to let go. Yeah, that's hard. Yeah. Right. Because you feel guilty and self conscious. And, you know, all the other things and all these people are doing more and better,
Dominique Astorino 51:23
But even Queens aren't perfect. Everyone's got something going on.
Courtney Resch 51:26
Yeah. So you just got to drop some things. And if you want or need to take a break from social media, because....
Dominique Astorino 51:32
Courtney suggests it
Courtney Resch 51:33
We all have to heal something. Yeah, do what you got to do. Yeah, we all gotta be there. Yeah, it's still gonna be there. I thought things would be the other side. And if people you know, you lose relationships, because the thing that's okay, new ones will come. If clients, you know, if you don't respond fast enough to their text, and they go to someone else for that, that that's okay.
Dominique Astorino 51:54
Yeah. The world's not gonna end.
Courtney Resch 51:56
I'm doing the best I can. And I know that that's actually pretty darn good. And that I have faith in
Dominique Astorino 52:02
you're kicking ass
Courtney Resch 52:03
Yeah, I mean, some some days. More than others. It's like, you know, it's all fine.
Dominique Astorino 52:08
Everything's fine. Yeah, it's fine. You're fine. So how are you feeling now?
Courtney Resch 52:11
I feel great.
Dominique Astorino 52:12
Yeah?
Courtney Resch 52:12
Yeah
Dominique Astorino 52:13
We were a little kind of antsy at the beginning. And now Yeah, everything's fine.
Courtney Resch 52:17
I mean, a little bit of wine, you know, goes a long way.
Dominique Astorino 52:20
We drank like, half the bottle. It's pretty good for us. I mean, for me, I mean, me.
Courtney Resch 52:28
That is our coping mechanism. Yeah. Drink at the end of the night, you know? And also I say to that's okay. Yeah, if that's what your thing is, is with your partner with yourself every night and you sit down and you have a glass of wine and you connect with yourself with your partner.
Dominique Astorino 52:42
It's mindful and deliberate. It's not like you were saying it's not you are aware, like you're very in tune with your body and like, you know that this is not addiction, and you've seen addiction in your family. So you've made a very clear distinction, which I think is really important for people. Like, if you do notice, like you're depending on it, and like you can't get through... [that's different]
Courtney Resch 52:59
I mean, life is hard. Yeah. Curious. Let's just like be graceful with people. Yeah, and everyone. Yeah, because it's hard. And we all know that we're all dealing with something that makes days harder than others and I'm just here to be me and hope that I can help people enjoy their days and get through
Dominique Astorino 53:18
Yeah, do your best get through and be nice to people
Courtney Resch 53:21
understanding of, you know, life and people and whatever triumphs they're going through.
Dominique Astorino 53:27
Yeah, that's perfect. Yeah, dude, thank you so much.
Courtney Resch 53:30
This was fun.
Dominique Astorino 53:31
This is really fun.
Courtney Resch 53:32
I want to do more
Dominique Astorino 53:32
okay, I want to make this like a standing date trauma hour?
Courtney Resch 53:36
Yeah
Dominique Astorino 53:37
Thank you for leading the first issue edition series episode of Trauma Hour Yeah, how do you feel about trauma Hour now?
Courtney Resch 53:46
it's fun.
Dominique Astorino 53:46
Yeah
Courtney Resch 53:47
I like it.
Dominique Astorino 53:47
Good times. Unpacking.
Courtney Resch 53:48
I would listen to us.
Dominique Astorino 53:51
I would date me. I mean. I, yeah, it's fine. So yeah, where can our listeners – which is probably like your husband and my mom — where can they Like get more from you and connect with you and Ashen salon.
Courtney Resch 54:09
Instagram? Yeah, Ashensalon.com. Courtney Resch, my handle is blondeseyeview. Yeah!
Dominique Astorino 54:19
Around La Jolla
Courtney Resch 54:20
Always around
Dominique Astorino 54:20
Say hi... get an aperol spritz at la valencia with us.
Courtney Resch 54:25
You know, I might be on a vacation somewhere. But either way, I'll respond when my brain tells me that I can.
Dominique Astorino 54:31
it'll be with me in France. Well, thank you so much. I love you and you cheers to trauma hour.
AD
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CREDITS
Thanks for tuning in to this episode of This is fine. I've been your host Dominique Michelle Astorino. We're based in San Diego recording in studio at DLI productions in Pacific Beach with Emmy award winning sound designer Dan De La Isla. This is a comedy and advice podcast but for legal reasons. This entire podcast is a joke and none of it is medical advice. To download a transcript or learn more visit thisisfinepodcast.com
